Thriving as the Only Female Wrestler on Your High School Team

Imagine walking into the wrestling room, the only girl among a sea of boys, feeling the weight of a thousand stares. You love the sport, but every practice brings new challenges: proving yourself to teammates who doubt your strength, navigating awkward moments in co-ed drills, and facing the lack of tailored support from coaches. Yet, despite the struggles, there’s an undeniable thrill in breaking barriers and showing everyone that you belong on the mat. This journey isn't just about wrestling; it’s about finding your voice, building resilience, and inspiring other girls to take their place in a traditionally male-dominated sport. Here’s how to thrive and turn these obstacles into stepping stones for success.

Navigating the Team Culture

When navigating the team's culture, it's crucial to respect existing traditions while confidently establishing your presence and perspective. Embrace your unique role and learn your strengths each time you attend practice. Open communication is your superpower—sharing your goals and experiences helps your teammates understand you better and fosters a more inclusive and supportive environment. The steep learning curve may seem daunting at first, but it ultimately leads to a positive experience and a stronger mindset.

Dealing with an Unsupportive Coach

If you face a lack of support from your coach, maintain professionalism and focus on your training. Lean into the teammates who support your goals and are great training partners. Finding guidance outside the school from other coaches or online communities can be beneficial. Documenting any instances of unfair treatment is essential should you need to address issues formally.

Finding Girls Competition Opportunities

Competition for female wrestlers may not be as abundant as for males, so it’s important to seek out girls’ wrestling events and establish a network with other female wrestlers. These connections can lead to more competition opportunities and a shared learning experience. Advocating for more girls' events can influence a gradual shift in available opportunities, paving the way for future athletes. Encourage your team to host a girls division at your home tournament. Ask local teams to bring their female wrestler(s) for dual meets. Creating opportunities is possible when you cultivate a network.

Managing Male Training Partners

Wrestling with boys as your main partners can be intimidating, considering the physical strength differences and competitive egos. However, turning these challenges into learning opportunities can significantly enhance your skills. Steer clear of partners out to hurt you or “put you in your place.” Find the partners in the room who have your best interests in mind and be a great partner for them as well. This will create mutual respect and allow you to focus on your technique and growth. Building confidence against tougher opponents will also prepare you for higher levels of competition.

Building a Support System

Creating a supportive network is invaluable. This network can include mentors who have experience in wrestling or other sports, friends, family, and online communities focused on female wrestling. Through this network, you can share experiences, seek advice, and gain encouragement. This support network will be critical when you are not feeling the most supported in your own wrestling room, should that be the case.

Creating a Positive Culture for Future Female Wrestlers

Lastly, shaping a positive culture for future female wrestlers is a profound responsibility. By leading through example and advocating for inclusivity, you can inspire more girls to join a wrestling team. Organizing events and clinics targeted at potential female wrestlers can also highlight the sport’s benefits and create a welcoming environment.

Thriving as the only female wrestler on a boys' team requires resilience, open communication, and a proactive approach to both learning and advocacy. Your journey can set a precedent, inspire others, and contribute to a more inclusive wrestling environment at your school and beyond.

Katherine Shai

Katherine Shai is a 7x National Team Member for Team USA. Throughout her long career she was top 10 in the world, a multi-time international medalist, University World Champion, Dave Schultz International Champion, 2x College National Champion, US Open Champion, and was 3rd at the 2012 and 2016 Olympic Team Trials and 2nd in the mini tournament for the 2021 Olympic Team Trials.

Katherine is currently mentoring and coaching athletes all over the country, as well as speaking on her experiences as a professional athlete in the challenging sport of wrestling. She is the founder of the athlete, parent, and coaching resource LuchaFIT. She aims to help more athletes and coaches grow in the sport of wrestling through her story and leadership. She serves as a Board Member of USA Wrestling, Titan Mercury Wrestling Club, and was a founding Board Member for Wrestle Like a Girl. She is a mother of 2 and resides in Denver, CO.

https://luchafit.com
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